If someone have had said to me a few years ago that you’ll on the 7th of April 2011, you’d feel better about yourself than you ever have, I wouldn’t have believed them. If they had have said to me that you’ll walk 20 flights of stairs in 10 minutes (and do boxing in between), I would have laughed in their face. If they had have said to me that the only thing stopping you from doing anymore exercise would be because you’ll run out of breath but not energy, I would have seriously worried about their mental state. But then again, if someone had said to me that you’ll end up weighing the same weight as a motorbike, a boat or some other forms of transportation, I would most certainly not have believed them.
Today I had my personal training session with Michael. I did things that I never thought I’d be able to do. For starters, I walked to the gym (which is 1.6km away from home), I walked up those bloody stairs over and over and over again (and held onto the rails in boxing gloves too!), I pushed myself further than what I thought I could go (with the help of Michael) and at the end of it, I felt like I was going to vomit so I must have done something good today.
I can’t begin to tell you how good I am feeling about myself at the moment. Sure, I am a bit sore, my pants are falling down and a lot of my tops look like nighties but, I my skin is looking and feeling fantastic, I have so much energy, I have this sense of self worth and pride that I didn’t ever imagine I’d have, I am achieving what I thought was the impossible and I am doing this for no other reason than because I want to earn my life back. I deserve it.
There are some things that are still holding me back. I got my results back from my Ultrasound and the man said that he couldn’t see any stones therefore, I had to have a CT scan. I went to the Doctors (my normal one is not there and neither is the other one I like – only the fataphobic one was) and he said ‘they referred you for a CT scan because you are too overweight to do an Ultrasound’. This was not a question but a statement. And this was not the case. The man who I saw has perfect vision of my kidneys however he said it may be a small stone and Ultrasounds can’t pick that up very well. I told the Doctor that I had lost 50 kilograms since August. The way he reacted was like I’d said 15kg!
I ended up booking the CT scan but also went down there to make sure that I’d fit through the Doughnut. I was almost in tears as I lay there seeing if I’d fit through. I did but my whole body wouldn’t have 6 months ago. The table also has a weight limit of 200kg. I was embarrassed that I had to go and check but I was relieved that I fit through. I was more relieved to know that every day I get closer not to have to worry about these sort of problems. I can’t wait until the day where I can have a scan or a test and not worry about my size or if I’ll fit.
My blood test came back. I am a bit low on Vitamin D. Everything else is fine. I am going to make sure I get some more Sun – I do spend a lot of time inside given the fact that I have an office job and now that day light savings has finished, there’s no outdoor after work walks for me for a while!
I am looking forward to the weekend. I am working overtime on Saturday but that will be topped off with a movie with Amelia! We haven’t caught up for so long and she is due to have her 6th baby soon :) I am going to Melbourne to pick up Callum who is spending the weekend with Mum and Dad. I am going to see my Nanna which will be nice. I’ll have to remember to bring the relay for life photos.
Some exciting news - it’s not officially confirmed but, I AM UNDER THE 190KG MARK! I say it’s not confirmed yet because I know my scales are a bit different from Dr Winnett’s scales. I am 189.7 kilograms according to my scales. That’s a loss of almost 55 kilograms. OMG. That’s insane. I am SO proud of myself. And as I have said before, this is actually happening but I can’t believe it. I will wait until my appointment with Jason on the 28th of April to announce the official weight but I shall make a NO MORE WEIGHING pact until I go and see him. Oh the suspense!
Thank you all again for your support. I got a beautiful Email yesterday from someone who I used to go to School with. They said some lovely things. I have inspired them to focus on their health as they have put on a lot of weight over the past few years. It was humbling to hear how they know if I can do it so can they. And it’s true.
Happy I’m able to help so many people just by sharing my story. And I am happy to feel so supported. Stay tuned – there’s SO much more to come :)
:) I'm so proud of you hon.... (hmm I need to do more myself though)
ReplyDeleteAnne - lose2live
OMG well done! so happy you are doing so well.
ReplyDeletewtg steph will try and call you over the weekend to arrange our catch up definitely gotta make it happen xx Nye
ReplyDeleteThanks guys xo
ReplyDeleteThinking about you Nye and your little girl xo
I'll give you a buzz over the weekend and we'll work something out for next week. Gotta love School Holidays. Blah.