I went Swimming on Wednesday night. I managed to do a Kilometre and it was so relaxing. I did a lot of thinking during my laps. I thought mainly about how much time I have been putting into myself lately. How the good things that I am doing for myself are showing on the outside and how I have had so many ‘no scale victories’ I have had over the past few weeks. I realised that I always had the time to work out and lose my weight, I just didn’t feel as though I am worth it. I know that there are so many people who say that they don’t have the time and I know that can be a factor (as you’d know, I work and have 4 kids so I am very time poor!) but, there was nothing stopping me from hiring a treadmill and parking it in the loungeroom.
When I am at the gym, I often think about things that have to be done at home – the washing, the homework, the cleaning, the mowing. I realise though that the more I work out, the more weight I lose and the more weight I lose the more energy I have so the quicker I clean and do the things that need to be done.
Last night, I was given some bad news about my Nanna. She doesn’t have very long to live as the Cancer has spread. I only saw her on Sunday and she is looking so well. We knew it was coming up but, being told that it’s coming up is different. My immediate thought was to start eating. I grabbed the box of Saladas, the tub of butter and the jar of vegemite. I hadn’t had dinner so, I figured that this could be my meal. I got through 3 and I couldn’t eat anymore. I felt sick.
It was such a strange sensation not being able to do something that I am used to doing. For the first time in months, I felt as thought the way to cure my ache was to eat. I couldn’t go to the gym as Brad was at Bingo. It was scary not having food to turn to. It was hard to work out what else to do. I ended up going to bed.
When I woke up this morning, I still felt like crap. I had my personal training appointment today and didn’t feel in the right frame of mind for it. I was very upset.
I got to the gym 45 minutes before my appointment. I chatted to one of the staff members for a while and then jumped on the tread mill. The walking really helped. It felt good to get some of my excess energy out and direct it somewhere productive. I walked for half an hour before Michael came over and told me it was time!
I told him about the fact that I am going to climb up the stairs of my building. Lucky for me, he already had stairs on the list for my work out for the day! I did SO well. I did 20 flights. He ended up taking the boxing component out of it as I was so puffed out. We just focussed on getting me up and down the stairs. After it, I needed to have my Asthma medication because I was really struggling to breathe. We then did some weights. I showed Michael a before photo of me and he was amazed at the difference. He took a photo of me on the stairs so that I can put it up here. He also said that he is going to try an make it to my stair climb which would be great.
|HORRIBLE stairs at the Gym. Ick.|
Although the last 24 hours have been a bit shitful, I have learnt a lot about myself I have learnt a lot about the new me and how I have started dealing with things compared to how I used to deal with things.
It’s going to be a tough few months – there are going to be a lot of hurdles put in my way. I am going to remain focussed and on track and remember why I am doing this and remember what goal I am working toward.
I forgot to mention that I measured myself again today - I have lost cms EVERYWHERE!
My neck is now 46cm - 2cm down from 2 weeks ago
My upper arm is 43cm - 3cm down from 2 weeks ago
My bust is 157cm - 3cm down from 2 weeks ago
My waist is 182cm - 4cm down from 2 weeks ago
My hips measure in at 185cm - down 1cm from 2 weeks ago
My upper leg is 74cm - down 1cm from 2 weeks ago
My calf is 50cm - down 2cm from 2 week ago
Go me! I am working my butt off and it's nice to see that it's showing :)