Sunday, July 10, 2011
Time for bed :) wonder what tomorrow will bring...
I am so tired and although it has been an exciting few days, I can’t wait to go to bed and sleep! I’ve been in touch with some amazing people over the past few days and have been introduced to a whole world of people I didn’t know existed. I have been directed to a number of blogs, websites, forums, articles etc… and look forward to sitting down with a cup of Coffee over the coming nights when everyone’s in bed to have a read of them all. I’ll also put together a blog with all of the bits and pieces that have been sent to me so that you can have a look to. I have also had a heap of questions Emailed to me which I hope in the coming weeks I’ll put together and answer in one hit.
One of the questions was about when I first started my blog. I am sure it was in July that I thought of the idea. When trying to work out the date, I looked at my ‘about me’ page (which is in desperate need of updating) but, I found what I had written interesting…
Now at 30, I still get picked on every day. On the train, at the Station, on the Bus, walking home – even when I am standing out the front of my own house. It’s hurtful. Although I have so many comebacks now for people who pick on me, it still doesn’t stop the fact that they’ve actually said something to me about it.
Because I am the size I am, I spend most of my time going out of my way to make others comfortable. Why should my weight interfere with other people enjoying their day? I guess that’s not really the right attitude to have although it’s really the only one I know. Because I’ve been kicked to the ground so many times, that’s where I feel I belong. And although I don’t feel fat until I am trying on a new pair of pants or a new skirt that doesn’t fit or when i am looking in the mirror, it doesn’t mean that I’m not.
I feel gorgeous. I feel happy. I feel like a true friend. I feel generous. I feel loving. I feel kind. I feel like I have so much to offer someone. I feel as though I have potential. I am caring. I am clever. I am funny. I am likeable. I am pretty. I am witty. I have drive. I show initiative. I am understanding. I am compassionate. I am determined. I am a fighter. I am FAT.
This time last year, I would have NEVER had the courage to do what I have done. And it’s taken a lifetime of torment and cruelty from a certain type of person to drive me to the point that I have gotten to.
I went to the Newsagent yesterday morning and got tapped on the Shoulder by a lovely girl who said ‘are you that fat girl’ and I replied ‘quite possibly’ and she said ‘ooohhh, I love you – can I have a photo with you?’. I was on the way to the Gym and looked a bit tired and trashy but, I was very flattered.
I also took a new lot of measurements yesterday and still wish I had have started taking them at the start of my journey. It would be great to see the difference between now and then although the difference is still quite amazing. Since the middle of March, I have lost 5cm around my Neck, 2.5cm around my upper arm, 12cm off my bust, 14cm from my waist, 13cm from my hips, 10cm from my upper leg and 7cm from my calf. I get weighed next week. I can’t wait to see how much I have lost. I was 186.3kg on the 9.6.2011. I have been working so hard to ensure I am as fit as possible for the climb but also to try and lose 10 kilograms between the 9.6.2011 and the 20.7.2011. Here’s hoping!
Yesterday at the gym, I did a 45 minute workout. Lots of walking, some running and some weights. I am not sure what my roster is like at work tomorrow but I shall bring my climbing gear to do some stairs if time permits in preparation for the big event in just 12 days time! I’ll be working out as much as possible in the coming days. I might even have another go of that dreaded stair machine.
I saw my Nanna and Poppa yesterday. Nanna was a little concerned as she thought I might be climbing up the stairs in my thongs like they showed me doing on Today Tonight. I assured her that I have runners! I did ask Poppa if he wanted to come up with me but he politely declined!
I am aiming to raise $5,000 for the Cancer Council and am 24% of the way there! To donate, simply go to http://vic.cancercouncilfundraising.org.au/personalPage.aspx?registrationID=342014&langPref=en-CA and any amount is appreciated. I also have an event page on Facebook that has more information about why, where and how. Feel free to visit http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=205688702802531 and if you’d like to invite your friends to the event to help raise awareness, that would be fantastic.
I have spent most of the day inside today (and even got the chance to have a Nanna nap). It’s been too cold to do anything else!
Off to work early tomorrow. Am going to get in early as I have a lot to do given the fact I had Friday off! Aiming to get there at 7 but given the fact we’re on busses at the moment, who can tell what time I’ll get there – I look forward to next week to having the trains back after they’ve finished the work on the train tracks.
Thank you everyone for your support. I feel honoured to have done what I did and although I didn’t expect this kind of reaction, I am happy that people are aware that it’s simply not acceptable behaviour and even though doing what I have done will probably never change a lot of people’s minds on how they act or think, it has certainly raised a lot of awareness on this important issue.
P.S – I am now on Twitter – you can follow me @iamabeetle please bear with my whilst I get used to using it. Had to google what a hashtag was!