Friday, November 12, 2010

Day 96 - 5 days to go :O

Wow!  Only 5 days left to go.  Feels quite strange writing that number down!

the last 24 hours have certainly been interesting.  I have been very wheezy over the past few days.  My cough has come back and I sound like a mouth organ when I wake up in the morning because I can't breathe properly.  Ventolin is doing nothing.  I do not have asthma.

I spoke to Linda from Jason Winnett's rooms yesterday and she suggested a chest XRay.  I arranged to have today off work so that i could go and sort everything out.  My normal Doctor is not currently in so, I have to see the other Doctor - the third on my list of Doctors I'll go and see.  The one who has said to me in the past that all fat people have a certain odour about them.

I went in this morning and explained to him that I am wheezing.  He is aware that i have Surgery on Wednesday as I saw him last week to get some more antibiotics to clear the cough up.  He stated that he thinks that I have asthma and it's nothing more than that therefore there is nothing to worry about . He said that I would have the asthma due to the fact that I am overweight.  I informed him that I have never had asthma in the past and I have been overweight for 30 years.  I am unsure what my weight would have to do with it.  He stated that it is because my lungs are struggling to work because of my size and they are compressed because of the rest of me... hmmm.

He gave me another inhaler to try.  I had a go and I coughed for about 5 minutes after having it.  I will continue to use it (due to the fact he has diagnosed me with asthma) and that my peak flow reading was 3.5 when for someone my age and height, it should be around 5.  It's funny as all of the speromitary testing that I had at Doctor Goldin's said I was fine and this was just after the initial bout of what started as the chest infection but turned into bronchitis.

Anyway, I asked for a chest XRay.  He reluctantly wrote one up for me.  I left the Surgery.  I was nearly in tears but held them in.  I swore a lot instead.  Out loud.  Talking to myself and calling him mean names (which I wouldn't dare write on here - this is a family show).

At the XRay place, I had a vent to the receptionist.  She knows of the Doctor and has had a similar experience with him.  We both agreed that he is a fatist and she said that she feels is a 'fataphobic' (a term I've never heard before but intend on using frequently).  I sat and waited.  Had my XRay.  Went home.

I now sit and wait.

I did give my anaesthetist a call.  I spoke to him about what has been happening.  He said if it's just a bit of asthma, he's still happy to proceed.  He asked if I was feeling well and checked I haven't lost my appetite (the temptation to bore him with the list of things I could eat if I was able to was great but, I resisted).  We spoke for about 20 minutes.  I have spoken to him prior to today but, seem as it's getting closer I asked a few more questions.

I informed him that I take Valium on occasions for anxiety.  He stated that he is happy for me to take some of this prior to coming in if this is something I feel will keep me relaxed and calm to the lead up for the procedure.  He stated that he can give me something to make me 'blissfully unaware' of what's going on prior to being wheeled into Surgery.  I was pleased with this :) and is an option I will take up.

It is so close now.  My heart jumps a bit when I think about it.  I am getting excited.  Monday was a day filled with fear, Tuesday was when I didn't really think about it, Wednesday I focused on other things and threw myself into work, yesterday was the same - I had other things to think about.  Today is a day of waiting.  And cleaning :/

I am optimistic that it will go ahead.  I can't read XRays but my chest looks pretty good to me.  I'll wait for the phone call from Jason for Wednesday's go ahead.

I still worry a bit about my liver.  Has it shrunk enough to have surgery?  Has any of the things that I have been doing over the past 3 months made a difference?  Hmmm.  We shall have to wait and see...

Things resisted today (so far).  I WANT CHICKEN!  I have been craving chicken for days and days and days.  I have had a piece here and there (from the stir fry last night) but, I could have a lot more if I were allowed to.  I also want Chocolate.  And garlic Pizza.  It's funny how I want the really bad things even though they weren't foods that I ate in the past. 

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