Friday, November 18, 2011

Clothes, Cruskits, Nuts, Kilograms and Tickets...

It was such a warm day today in Melbourne.  Summer is defiantly approaching!

I don't feel the heat as much as what I did last year but in saying that, I went to my Cupboard this morning to find something to accommodate such a hot day but have nothing to wear as everything from last year is too big!  I am going to have to go shopping, I think.

The last few days have been fantastic.  My eating is certainly back on track.  I have been drinking a fair bit of water and I don't have any hunger sensation at all.  It's been really good to start feeling 'normal' again.  I had a Banana Vive for Breakfast, 2 Cruskits and cream cheese for lunch, some pureed apple for afternoon tea and haven't yet had anything for dinner.  When you have the band and you're not hungry, it's often hard to remember when it's time to eat and given the fact it's almost 9.45pm and I'm working Overtime tomorrow, I am best to worry more about sleep then something to eat!

I've worked so hard this week.  Not sure what we are doing on Sunday.  I haven't even checked the Weather.  I want to do something nice with the Kids.  I have each Wednesday off but the Twins are home so it's not really a day off as such. It's a challenge to get everything that needs to be done in the one day but, somehow, a majority of it gets finished.  It's called organised chaos.  And I am happy t say I am the master of it!

I am really looking forward to Christmas.  I started doing the shopping a few weeks ago.  I picked up a few more things today and am going to start working out what to cook.  We are having it here again this year.  It's fun working out what to make.  The ham I made last year was divine and although I could only have a tiny slither of it, just the smell of it was enough to ease my cravings.

I've been craving lots of different foods recently (no, I am not pregnant).  I really wanted Blueberries the other day.  And Chocolate is a constant thing I want.  I also craved bubble and squeak!  Not sure where these things come from!  I had a friend who had a constant craving for nuts.  If she had too many, she got a tummy ache.  You still get cravings or a want for food when you have a lap band.  It's just a matter of realising that you can't eat them either because they'll get stuck or because they're not good for you! 

When you first become banded, there is something they often refer to as 'head hunger' which is where you see something that you'd like to eat but, you're not hungry so, you need to resist it.  I've been having a few of those moments over the past few days.  It's like I've started back at the beginning again and that's not a bad thing.  It's just strange going through all of these sensations again.

I'd like to thank everyone for the overwhelming support over the past few days.  It's been amazing.  This time last year, I was in bed!  I was still tired and sore and knocked out because of the strong pain killers I'd been prescribed.  I'm still amazed at how fast the time has gone. 

I received a lovely Email from a reader today who spoke about how she appreciated my honesty.  How I am not afraid to say that I've stuffed up and as she is a bandit, she knows how it feels to have a set back on your journey.  She actually had the same thing happen (had all of her fluid removed) and she put on 15 kilograms in just under 5 weeks.  Her band slipped back into place and everything went well again (just like mine has) but, she reminded me why my band slipped in the first place - it was because I had lost so much weight.  And it will probably do it again.  If it happens again, I know that I will be better prepared for it.  But, I don't beat myself up about 9 kilograms.  Although I did cop a bit of crap for it (as I had expected), those who bagged me had no idea as to what it is like to be a bandit.  I had no idea what it was like before I got it.  And I am still learning!  I think it takes a few years to totally appreciate how to work with your band. 

When you succeed at something, it's an amazing feeling.  And I have done so well.  Sorry if I have tickets on myself but, they are well deserved tickets :) I've never had tickets before.  And I'm only going to get more of them.  And like I've said, there's no stopping me now and there's nothing holding me back.  There are so many more tremendous things to come.

3 comments:

  1. Steph I've just caught up on the last few blog posts. Congratulations on your bandversary!!! You have so much to be proud of. From the start you have stood up and publically spoken out against hateful comments and treatment of those of us that are overweight. I know you take a lot of crap for that, and it just makes me admire you more.

    You have basically been on a liquid diet for a year. The fact that circumstances have allowed you to go from that to eating 'real' food and this has resulted in some weight gain is not a 'failure'. I think your failure should really actually be seen as a success - 9kg after eating food for the first time in a year? Honey that's nothing!! I can't think of a person on this earth that wouldn't react the way that you did - you took advantage of the situation!! As a recovered avid "Survivor" watcher for several years I have never seen any of those skinny minnies crave for a salad sandwhich after being on the island for several weeks. Believe me, it's burgers and chocolate all the way!! I'm not sure anyone reading your blog and hearing what you've done in the past year would use the term "fat, lazy cow" to describe you (as you have described yourself). Well, anyone who doesn't get their kicks from making others feel bad so they can feel good that is.

    I have shed a few tears for you this morning while reading your recent entries. I am so happy though, that you appear to be over that horrible time you were having when you couldn't even keep water down.

    I particularly loved seeing your pics with the "relay for life" top on. I know that when we did the Melton relay this was a big goal for you. Well done!!

    I think you are just incredible. There are few people that can go to bed at night knowing that they have made a positive difference to the world. You are one of those people honey xxx

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  2. You are fantastic. I am in awe.

    Put all of this other stuff behind you. You are better than her. And you did everything you could to help. People need to want to be helped. You are wonderful for sticking by her for the length of time you did.

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  3. You are a beautiful person. Inside and out.

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