Pouches, fluid, football, food, stairs, sick days and a funny :)

I’ve had a busy week!  Thank you to everyone who Emailed me about my appointment on Wednesday and sorry to those who have been waiting for me to update my blog to let you know how I went!

I shall start at Monday.  On Monday, although I was feeling awfully sick, I went to work.  I ended up going home early (2ish) as I kept being sick even though I hadn’t been drinking or eating anything, my saliva wasn’t going down.

I didn’t go in on Tuesday either.  I couldn’t keep anything down and I just kept vomiting.  It was horrible.  I felt awful.

Wednesday came around (this is starting to sound like ‘the very hungry Caterpillar story’!) and I went and saw Dr Winnett.  He had a look at my images from my barium swallow and said that he doesn’t think that I have a small pouch at all.  He did say it could be a bit large but, it’s nothing to worry about.  I told him how I’d been feeling over the past few weeks (terribly stressed and moody) and we spoke about how problems like this can start playing on things like the feeling of depression and major mood swings (especially if you have experienced such things in the past, which I have). 

He said he wanted to take all the fluid out of my band.  It took him a few minutes to find the port!  I’m lucky – I don’t feel the needle at all.  I am not sure if it’s because I am numb due to the fact it’s so close to the incision from surgery but, the most uncomfortable thing about having an adjustment for me is having to lie down on a folded pillow and position myself in a sit up position.  It’s quite a work out!  He finally got access and took the fluid out (forgot to ask how much I had in there).  He has asked that in 6 weeks I go and have another Barium swallow and after I have done that, I go back and see him.  I might end up celebrating my bandversary (on the 17^th of November) with no fluid in it!  He also said that I might end up feeling hungry over the next few days.  That will be a strange sensation if it happens!

I also know that I am going to be able to fit more food in.  And different types of foods that I haven’t had ina while.  This is here willpower is going to come in.  And also what I have learnt over the past 12 or so months about what to eat and what not to eat is going to come into play.  I can do this although it’s going to be a challenge to see how well I do.  Once I am feeling better, I’ll be off to the gym.  I have the upcoming relay for life to train for plus, I’m feeling so frumpy after not doing anything for the past few weeks.

So yesterday, I got up at 5.30 (as I do on a work day), had a shower, got dressed and as I was about to walk out the door, I needed to go the toilet.  And without sharing specifics and too much information, that’s where I stayed for about an hour and that’s where I ended up heading several times during the day.  I went to see the Doctor and he gave me something for it as I had the worst stomach cramps.  It felt like I was having a baby.  It hurt SO much.  I ended up laying in bed for 90% of the day.  I caught up on the last weeks worth of Neighbours and had Charlotte act as my Nurse (she insisted on taking my temperature every few minutes when she got home from baby school).  I got up a few times throughout the night last night but am feeling a lot better today.

Missy Nurse

I am still achy but have managed to do a bit of cleaning and feel as though I have enough energy to prepare a brown and gold feast for my family tonight (brown and gold as Hawthorn are playing Collingwood tonight and I HOPE Hawthorn kick their butts!).  I am going to get my recipe book out after I’ve done some more housework and compile a lovely menu consisting of things such as golden potato wedges with BBQ sauce, mushroom and corn vol au vents, brown and gold cup cakes and bananas with chocolate custard for desert.  I am sure I can come up with some more ideas as the day passes.

So, everything is good at the moment.  Well, other than the fact I can’t seem to feel better.

I was also disappointed to be advised that Today Tonight won’t be airing my stair climb story at this stage :( I have asked if I can have the footage as it was such an achievement and a milestone in my journey but I have had no response to my request.  I am still on my mission to raise the $5,000 for the Cancer Council (we’re up to $3,394 – we’re SO CLOSE!).  My Aunty Linda has donated 2 quilts that she has made that we are going to auction on Ebay (watch this space!).  I also have a few cheques that I need to send to the Cancer Council to be applied to the total.  I was hoping that the Today Tonight story would generate some more interest and therefore some more donations to help us get to the $5,000 so that we could get a research award in my Nanna’s name but, if they’re not going to run the story, I shall have to find other ways of raising the remaining $1,606. 

If you are a new reader and are not aware of what this is about, I set myself a mission to climb the 46 floors of the building I work in (the Melbourne Central Tower).  I achieved it in 47 minutes and was doing it to raise money for the Cancer Council as my Nanna was diagnosed with pancreatic Cancer just over a year ago.  She passed away 2 days before I climbed the stairs.  She was fully aware of what I was doing and I am sure she knew that I would make it as she had such faith in my mission and what I was doing.  Here is the link to donate if you’d like to…

http://vic.cancercouncilfundraising.org.au/personalPage.aspx?registrationID=342014&langPref=en-CA

I’m 165.9kg today.  That’s 77.1kg in 415 days.  Wow.  I’ve nearly lost 80kg.  When I’ve lost 100kg, I might treat myself to a little cocktail party :)

I have to put this up too as I found this rather amusing - feel free to post what you got if you'd like :) there were some funny responses when I put it up on Facebook...

CARN THE MIGHTY HAWKS!

Hanging out for Wednesday...

Hope everyone has been having a good weekend :) it’s been wonderful weather.  I’ve been lucky enough to lap some of it up – mainly whilst hanging clothes on the line!  Other than that, I have spent most of the time inside cleaning!  
 
The liquid diet is going quite well.  It’s been hard to stick to.  I see Dr Winnett on Wednesday and hope that he has some solutions for my tinsy problem.  A lot of people have asked me if I am anxious about the possibility of having more surgery.  To be honest, no I’m not.  When I had my Surgery in November last year, I weighed around 220kg.  I am now around the 165kg mark.  The most dangerous part of my Surgery was the actual banding procedure itself and part of the reason why was because of my weight.  Considering I’ve lost almost 60kg since then, the risks of anything majorly going wrong have dropped dramatically.  And the major things were the things that I was worried about most of all when I had the surgery initially (major being death!).

I’ve had a few people tell me of their experiences with a small pouch.  One person had their band removed and then replaced a month later.  Another had all of the fluid from their band taken out and the problem fixed itself.  Another person decided to get rid of their band all together and go for a more permanent solution (gastric sleeve). 

It’s not much fun not being able to eat anything.  It’s like I am on the ‘pre banding’ diet I was on at the beginning but in saying that, I have been mixing it up a bit.  I have been having mainly Sustagen when I’m at work and I’ve having the Isagenix shakes at home.  I prefer the Isagenix as they’re not as sweet as the Sustagen and they fill me up more as they are quite bulky.  I am going to weigh myself tomorrow morning and see how much I’ve lost in the 2 weeks that I haven’t really been eating.  In saying that, I’ve actually been having  more KJ intake than what I normally do due to the shakes that I’ve been having.  If anything, I may have hit a plateau in my weight loss for the moment due to the fact that I’ve been able to track (and have had to) keep track of everything I’ve eating (or should I say sucked on or drank) to make sure that I am keeping on track.

Brendan took me to a bike shop the other day where they sell gels for bike riders so they can get a hit of energy.  I had one of these on Thursday and Friday.  If it weren’t for them, I may have fallen asleep at work!  I was SO tired!  I have a few of them left at work.  They are a very hard jelly consistency.  They are quite nice.  They are sickly sweet though and you need to drink a fair bit of water when you have them.  They are a mini lifesaver though. They are called ‘Eundura sports nutrition’.  They have about 500kj in them.

I have put up my September front and side photos a little late!  This month has gone so fast.  I did take these at the start of September.  I also need to take my measurements as well which I will do some time this week.

I really felt like having a glass of wine this afternoon – must be the Weather!  I had a dance instead.  I reckon I burned just as many KJ as what would have been in the wine that I was going to consume.  I am proud of myself :) I might have it tonight though if I still feel like it…

Hope everyone has a great week :)

I don't select! I'm too fat!

I need to whinge... I did have a good day so, for those who are sick of my whinging, I shall title each paragraph with what it is about so you can choose what to read! 

NON WHINGE - MY NEW CAR! - I got my car today :) it was wonderful to pick it up.  I picked it up at 2pm.  The Twins were so excited.  They are so comfortable in it and there is so much room.  It is lovely to drive and I got a reversing sensor installed which I am sure will come in handy.  I got it tinted as well.  It's so pretty.  I just need to think of a name for it.  It will be nice for the other one to have a bit of a rest.  I'll clean it out and make it all pretty and get some of the things that need repairing fixed.


WHINGE - REAL INSURANCE - I am trying to get income protection insurance.  I am going to name names as I am not being rude about them, I am just unsure about their screening process and policy.  I spoke to Real Insurance.  I gave them all my personal details (address, income etc...) and then they asked me for some further information.  They asked me questions about drinking, smoking, height and then weight - as soon as I told him how much I weigh, he informed me that they would not be able to offer me the insurance as my BMI is over 32.  I said I was prepared to go for a medcial however, he informed me they don't do medicals, they just assess people over the phone.  I was so cross.  Not at him but, the policy.  I pointed out to him that a lot of healthy and fit people would not be able to have their income protection insurance as they would be over the maximum BMI.  I asked if I could leave feedback and he informed me I was being recorded so, I let it rip!  I probably spoke uninterrupted for 2 minutes.  When I got off the phone, I started to cry.  I'd need to be 120kg to be able to get income protection insurance through them. 


MORE WHINGE - ABOUT ISELECT THIS TIME - iSelect then phoned me.  I had lodged an enquiry with them online last night.  They phoned about an hour after I had gotten off the phone to Real Insurance.  I advised him of BMI before he even started asking questions about my income.  He informed me that he was quite sure they wouldn't be able to offer me anything.  I said I had to go (I was at a play centre and Charlotte had fallen over) and I hung up the phone.  He phoned me back 5 minutes later and informed me that none of their providers (all 5 of them) would offer me Insurance because of my weight.  I had a small rant but didn't want to waste my breath.  He did suggest I phone the people I have my Superannuation with to see if they can offer anything.  I might just do that.


KIND OF WHINGE - MY SMALL POUCH - Blah.  My small pouch is starting to become a big problem. I can't eat.  Well, I can eat really small amounts of very soft things.  If it doesn't disolve in my mouth, there is no point in swallowing it.  I am feeling sick.  I am moody.  I am so up and down.  It is horrible at the moment.  Dr Winnett's receptionist phoned me today and I am booked in for an appointment next Wednesday.  I wonder if I am going to last that long... I am dizzy and dehydrated.  I am trying to keep going but it's getting difficult.  I am just wanting a resolution - I don't care what it is, I just don't want to keep feeling like this.


WHINGE - BROKEN LAP TOP - The Boys broke my lap top.  I went to do my Homework on it last night, opened it up and it had been stood on.  I am so annoyed.  I bought a new on but it's not the same - my other lap top was like home :( I don't have word or anything on this one so, I'll have to make do for the moment.  I might get the screen fixed on the broken one and let the Boys have it.  This one is MINE!  I have a password they'll never guess on it :)


I hope everyone is well :) I'm sorry to vent.  I guess having a blog is great as you can let it all out - on day, I might let it ALL out and really show how 'days of our lives' my life can be! 


I shall take my fat, un insured butt to bed and have a rest so I'm not grumpy tomorrow!

Funny search words...

On Blogspot, I get the chance to see stats and sometimes some of the words that are used when people stumble across my blog are funny.  Here are the ones from the past month…

Fat girls planking

Movingforwardlookingforward.blogspot.com

Shoes stair

Slipped lap and pictures

Tough PT changes

What else can I have with gravy?

Extreme thumbs

Overweight foot

34 weeks pregnant with twins

Today tonight 2 tickets

I have a small pouch... *medical images included down the bottom - may annoy some readers*

Just before you start to read, I have put images from my Gastroscopy down the bottom of my blog.  I have also put some images up from my Barrium Swallow which aren't as 'confronting' as they are an X Ray.  These are located half way down the page.  Sorry in advance if this offends anyone...

Today I had my endoscopy.  I thought it was at 12.30 however, it was actually scheduled for 9.30.  Lucky Brad got the paperwork that I needed to fill out prior to attending the clinic in the morning else I would have missed it.

I have and plenty of gastroscopys before as I had gall stones whilst I was pregnant with Callum.  After he was born, I had a lot of problems with tiny stones that I had gotten stuck along the 7 and a bit months of my pregnancy which meant I had to have a stent inserted into my bile duct before they went ahead and crushed the rest of the stones with a net. 

I had to fast from midnight last night (which wasn’t a problem as I’m not hungry!) although I did end up having to have a sip of water as I needed to have one of my indigestion tablets.  I have required these a fair bit over the past few weeks.

After I had the procedure (and was with it enough to enjoy watching Ellen whilst sipping on applie juice), Dr Winnett came and saw me. He told me that I have developed a small pouch and that I may require surgery to fix it.  He said that he wanted me to have a barium swallow and a follow up appointment had been made for me to see him after the test results had come through.

I went and had the barium swallow right away.  For those who haven’t had one (or don’t know what happens), you stand in front of an X Ray Machine and when prompted, you drink a contrast liquid (about the texture of Mylanta) and as you drink it, pictures are taken of what is going on as the fluid passes through the esophagus and in my case, my band.  It is quite bizarre watching it work!  I would have a mouthful of the ‘goo’ and I’d watch it go down my throat and to my stomach where it would sit on top of my band for a while before it drained through.  It was taking longer than what it should (which is why I was having this test).  I then had to eat a salada.  It was revolting as it was stale.  I had to eat it quite quickly so that they could see what happened when my band was put under ‘stress’.  The same thing happened – it didn’t do a lot – the fluid sat on top of the salada and managed to find it’s way through the cracks.  I then got dressed and he took another few pictures to show what happened after 5 minutes of eating the salada.  Not a lot had happened.

The white stuff is the fluid sitting on top of my band...

Another picture of the fluid going through my band and then to my stomach...

I found the pictures really interesting.  I am yet to fully research what a ‘small pouch’ is as I was a bit out of it when Dr Winnett was telling me what was going on.  On my report, it says that I have moderate erythematous.  If anyone has gone through it before, feel free to share your experiences and thoughts. 

If I do have to have more surgery, I’m not really that upset about it.  When you have any type of Surgery done, there are pros and cons.  This is one of those things that happens.  I will take it one step at a time.  The only thing I am a bit annoyed about is that everything has healed so nicely!  My scars are looking brilliant now.  Just a small set back on my way to having the perfect bikini body :)

The oher pictures are below... stop looking now if you don't want to see them!  You have been warned!

...

...

...

...

...

...



Slippage?

As you may know, for the past few weeks, I have struggled with food going down.  Dr Winnett took some fluid out of the band just over a week ago  and this seemed to help a bit for the first few days but after that, I have hardly been able to keep a thing down.  Things other than shakes, water and jellies that is.  It has been a struggle.  And hasn’t been a lot of fun.

I haven’t had a lot of energy to go and do a lot because I haven’t been keeping much down and I have been quite irritable.  I imagine that this is my body’s way of saying ‘feed me’.  I’ve had a lot of suggestions from a lot of people ranging from ‘don’t have yoghurt or butter as it’s dairy’ to ‘have maxalon as it will make you feel better’ but, it’s not an illness that I have so I can eat all the dairy I want and maxalon won’t make a different as it’s possible that there is something wrong with my band… I have a Gastroscopy arranged for Monday and it can’t come quick enough.

I remember when I was reading up about the band, I came across something saying that if your band was either too tight or to loose, you would end up eating the wrong this.  This is so true.  When it’s loose, pretty much ANYTHING will go down!  Mine was like this after I had my Surgery up until I had my first fill.  I was enjoying steak, bread (including bread rolls), pizza crust – things that shouldn’t get past the band but do when you don’t have enough fluid.  Now that it’s too tight, I am scrounging for things that I can eat.  My faves so far are a few teaspoons of Pavlova and cream or mushed up strawberries.  These foods do not give me the required amount of nutrients per meal but they do taste good and they don’t make me vomit!

I’m not really worried about what the outcome will be on Monday after I have had the Gastroscopy.  I am aware that my band may have slipped which may mean I’ll need surgery to fix it.  Like I said, I am not worried about the outcome of what Monday will bring – more just getting it fixed.  I’ve been quite bad over the last few days where I have considered going to Hospital to be hydrated.  I feel SO icky.

So, there’s my whine.  I don’t have a lot to say other than the above!  I’ll keep you updated on what happens on Monday.  Fingers crossed things are good.  I think what might happen (and I have read it happening in other cases) is they remove some of the fluid to see if it fixes itself up.  I suppose I’ll know more come time after the procedure has been completed.

Feel free to ask any questions you may have – I am lucky to have had no bumps in the road so far during my journey – let’s hope it continues to be that way!

Steph xo

Kazz's story

Kazz's story :)

So I will start at the beginning....in 2006 I weighed in excess of 170 kilos. Back then I was always sick. Whether a virus, kidney infections, chest infections, flu or whatever....ALWAYS sick (bit sad when the receptionists at the medical clinic know you by name because you are there so regularly!) Anyway in May of 2006 I caught bronchitis. I was off work for 7 weeks (most of this unpaid) and I didn’t even have the energy to take a deep breath to cough. Anyway I lived alone, and it gave me a LOT of time to think. I was barely able to care for myself, local family support was limited and financially it was a real drain. It gave me plenty of time to think and I realised if something didn’t change I would going to end up confined to my home on a pension. Besides the bronchitis life was obviously hard in lots of different ways. I had very severe fluid retention in my feet and calves, I fell over a lot, walking was a struggle, climbing stairs was ridiculously hard...life in general was just that.....HARD.

I decided as soon as I was well enough I would join weight watchers. I signed up on August 6, 2006 to weight watchers and weighed in at 170.9 kilos. I slowly started to follow the weight watchers plan. By December 23, 2006 I had already lost 20 kilos. I was ecstatic. In February 2007, I joined curves. I attended Curves for 10 weeks. In that entire time I was following the plan and working out three times a week and managed to lose a whole 700 grams!! I eventually ended up with a slight neck injury from their equipment, when I explained the injury they made no effort to check my form so I quit.

For a little over a year I really accomplished not much. My weight stayed around the 150-155 kilos mark. I didn’t feel I had the answer and I felt I was in the “too hard” basket. In early 2008 I joined Fernwood Womens Gym, but I wasn’t in the right head space. I had a trainer I didn’t click with and she wanted me at the gym 6 days a week. It felt like a job I just didn’t want to do. It didn’t take long and I was avoiding the gym, avoiding her calls and by the end of May 2008 I had cancelled the gym and paid out my membership. Over the next few months the same thing happened, my weight fluctuated and I knew if I didn’t do something I was going to end up back over 170 kilos again.

I had always felt I needed a “personal” approach and knew exercise was going to be key to this. I had two options (As far as I could see). There was a local contours I could join which was a 5 minute walk away from my house or I could rejoin Fernwood which was in the city and not local to work or my house. So I wrote a email to Fernwood and spoke to Contours. I changed my mind so many times over the next few weeks. It changed on practically a 20 minute regular time frame. One minute Contours and the next minute Fernwood. I was leaning towards Fernwood as I knew I needed a “personal” approach but Contours was local. Eventually Fernwood wrote back to me and offered me 1 free food coaching session per week for a year. So I went in and saw their Membership Consultant. I explained I felt the pervious trainer was too hard core for me and that I felt I was in the “too hard basket”. She felt I would work well with Fiona a trainer there and the next thing you know I was signed up and committed!!! I went home and made some decisions. Firstly I was going to commit myself 100%. I was only not going to attend my PT session if I was on deaths doorstep and I was not going to say “no” or “I can’t” in a session. I also decided I would give up complete control, if my trainer wanted me to do something I would put enough trust into her to simply do it.

My first session with Fiona was on August 18, 2008. At the very first session Fiona came and got me. I was on the cycle and as I got off I stumbled, she asked me if I do that often – which back then I did. And she basically told me straight away that my balance was something we would work on. We then chatted and I explained that the gym felt like a “chore”. So one of the initial focuses was just to get me not to “hate” the gym. I had committed to one PT session per week and in the beginning that was the only time I attended the gym. Just once a week I came in did my PT session and went home. I enjoyed the sessions, I liked having that 30 minutes a week spent with someone who was on my side and where the focus was me and my journey. Slowly over time I increased my time at the gym. Initially I did a longer warm up. Then I started to come a extra day per week.Before I knew it I was going to the gym three times a week. I wasn’t doing fitness classes but I was managing 30 minutes on the bike and treadmill. Slowly I started to increase my PT sessions, by mid 2009 I was doing 3 sessions per week and loving it. My sessions were a mixture of boxing and weights. By this point I had lost another 20 kilos and was at around 130 kilos. And in the midst of what turned out to be a SEVEN month plateau. Complete self doubt that I could get lower than 130 kilos had overtaken me. I truly didn’t think I could lose any more. I was eating well and doing 3 PT sessions per week – it made no sense. In around June of 2009 I decided that “something was missing” – I had no idea what was missing but I felt like I was missing part of the puzzle to obtain the weight loss. At that stage I decided I was going to make this “my passion”. I signed up for google alerts, reading books, journals, weight loss forums....absolutely anything I could get my hands on – and what I found was that I was absolutely interested in nutrition, exercise, healthy living, organic foods.  I still was on my plateau, but I was enjoying the healthy lifestyle. December 2009 Jillian Michaels (who to say is my idol is the understatement of the year!) released a new book. Being a gal who has PCOS this book was all on how our hormones are our metabolism and if we balance out the hormones then the losses would happen. The ultimate theory to it all was to eat unprocessed foods. My trainer, Fiona also lent me “inner beauty, outer health” by Joanna McMillan and I was hooked. I realised for me I needed to go back to how things were in the 1950’s. No microwave, no fangdangled processed meals and treats – just going back to eat things and cooking things my Grandma would have made.

So out went the microwave oven (I still don’t own one!) and I started to cook and eat towards a more organic lifestyle. At the start of 2010 i weighed 135.8 kilos – by Christmas 2010 I was under 105 kilos! I was ecstatic. Thirty kilos in a year seemed more then enough. Over that I really enjoyed the weight loss process and even the gym. I always had a goal to do fitness classes. By the end of 2010 I was pretty much doing all classes except body attack and body step. I was not only doing them I was doing them back to back or doing a class followed by a PT session – yes ME!

In October 2010 I even had Jillian Michaels comment on my photo on facebook. 2010 had been a great year. And some of the biggest accomplishments happened at Christmas time last year. Firstly I flew on a plane! I had not been on a plane for 8 years. My sister lives a 6 hour drive from me and I had always caught the bus to her place because I thought the plane wasn’t do-able. Anyway so I decided to tempt fate and fly over and TA-DA I easily fitted in the seat and needed to TIGHTEN the seat belt – no seat belt extensions for this chickadee. Then my sister told me Christmas Afternoon would be at the beach – normally this would be a EEK situation! But I was prepared – board shorts and a bathing top with a tank top. For the first time in well over 10 years I went swimming! No sitting on the sidelines of life this Christmas Day. I was in the water for well over a hour and even went back another couple of times before coming home.

2010 really put the stepping stones into place for what a great year 2011 was going to be. Mid February of this year I was heading off in a plane again! This time to Sydney where I met up with my trainer and her best friend. On the Saturday night we went out to dinner and then CLIMBED the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Once again the fears set in, would I fit in the outfit you have to wear, would I manage the climb okay.  The outfit fitted! I didn’t have a heart attack climbing the bridge! I climbed it and enjoyed it, spectacular views with lots of laughs – it was definitely a highlight.

In March of this year, I was told I was PT Client of the Month at the gym (only the second person to get that ) and to top of the month I finally went under 100 kilos! Suddenly I was a double digit girl. WOW. Several years earlier my doctor had told me the most I could hope for was to get down to 100 kilos but I had beaten that! I was getting close to normal. I seriously couldn’t believe it!

Not too long ago, I got a email from Lorna Jane (the fitness wear company – I had submitted my before and after pics as part of a competition). Lorna Jane is writing a book and they want to include my story in it. ME! In a book! Seriously things like this don’t happen to me. To see I was dumb struck to be asked is the understatement of the year. I have slowly moved from the girl watching on the sidelines to the girl things happen too.

Last weekend, it was 5 years since I started this journey. I organised a dinner (all but one person I had met during the last 5 years which shows you how much more sociable I have become), I had 17 friends attend, I wore a gorgeous long and low cut dress (which in itself got lots of comments!). A number of friends (who I hadn’t seen for a few months) said they didn’t recognise me and I was like a butterfly emerging. I was told I was beautiful and gorgeous. Me the girl who once weighed 170 kilos who was once ashamed of herself – was now looking and feeling pretty.

I have kept chipping away at the weight loss. Its not easy. So often I want to throw it all away and go eat KFC and not exercise. But the happiness I get on a daily basis cannot compare to the feeling KFC gives me. I now weight 87.6 kilos. My ultimate goal weight is 70 kilos (but I will be happy with anything between 70-77 kilos). My goals for the rest of the year is to get to 77 kilos by Christmas and with luck 70 kilos by next June. But I am not in a rush. I don’t mind only losing 400-500 grams per week. Excess skin will be a issue for me, which is partly why I am not in a rush. But I will get there...simply by not giving up.

I would like to thank Steph for sharing my story. I am a big believe in giving back. When I commenced my weight loss for the majority of that time I didn’t have a reference point, I didn’t know anyone who had lost 80 or 100 kilos. I would have loved someone who I could ask for advice and their experience who had lost similar numbers that I had to lose. So getting my story out there and being a support in the weight loss community is a important goal for me long term.

If you have managed to read all of this....congratulations! Its quite a long read, and if you want to follow more of my journey please feel free to visit me at http://kazzsjourney.blogspot.com

Thank you for sharing your story, Kazz :) it is so inspiring and I am amazed at your results.  Well done xo

If you'd like to share your story, feel free to Email me - movingforwardlookingforward@gmail.com - if you wish to remain anonymous, this can be done.  Karen gave me written permission to use her story and her photos (just in case anyone was wondering!).

Cars, babies, parks, family, friends - what a weekend!

Happy Father’s day to all the Dads out there (especially mine).  I hope that everyone had an amazing weekend.  Mine was brilliant :)

I went and signed off on the new Car yesterday.  I am SO excited!  At the moment, all of the kids are quite squashed so it will be great when they have a bit more room to move around.  The car should be ready on Wednesday which is great as that’s my day off :) I took the older 2 for a drive in when we signed the paperwork yesterday and they are very pleased.  I wonder what the twins will think?

My eating has stabilized a bit since I had the .3ml removed from my band.  I have found that I have still kept vomiting a bit and burping a lot so, I am going to stick with a liquid diet until next week when I have my gastroscopy to confirm that everything is okay. 

Yesterday afternoon, I caught up with baby Sage, Andi and Matt. It was so nice to see all of them (especially Miss Sage – love to have snuggles).  Charlotte got to have a cuddle of Sage and hasn’t spoken about much since.  I am trying to get through to her that we are not having any more babies!  I hope she understands soon!

Matt is an Isagenix consultant.  He’s personally experienced an amazing transformation from using the products so I thought I’d give them a go.  I’ll weigh myself in the morning and then again on Monday next week to see what the results are!  When he gave me a sample of it yesterday, I was almost full of a serve and didn’t get the bloating feeling that I do with other brands of shakes.  I like the idea that it’s nutritionally balanced so I know that I am getting what I need and it’s quite low in KJ too – just a tad over 1000kj per serve. I shall let you know how I go!  Isagenix is a new product in Australia but is very well known in America – here is the link for Matt’s website http://www.getleanandfit.isagenix.com and his Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/pages/Matt-Layton-Get-Lean-and-Fit/220775557969537.  I shall keep you up to date on how I go!

I went to the Park today to catch up with Dad for Father’s day.  It was nice to run after the kids in the Sunshine.  I am amazed at the amount of energy I have at the moment.  Going to parks and places like that no longer worry me – I actually enjoy the idea of getting up and following the kids around – playing with them rather than watching from a distance.  It’s days like today where I realise how far I’ve actually come.  I have also had to move my seat in the car a few notches forward as it’s no longer comfortable having it all the way out.  That was a strange sensation!

I’m going to try to get to the gym a bit more this week than what I have been in the last few weeks.  I have been so busy and it’s been difficult to find time but, I’ll do my best.  The Weather has been beautiful of late so if it keeps up, some early morning walks to the train station might be in order :)

I went hunting for some photos of myself from this time last year.  These photos were taken on the 16th of Septemer 2010.  I look SOOOOO different.  Shane Crawford is still stunning though :)

I hope everyone has a fantastic week xo

P.S - good luck tomorrow, Loddell.  Enjoy your first day of work xo

WEIGH DAY! 74.1kg down in 393 days!

It’s been a busy few days! 

To start with, it’s my second week at work where I am working 4 days rather than the 3.  This might not sound like a lot to some but for me, it’s huge!  I took 4 a total of 4 and a half years off in work beginning in 2007.  I returned last year in March and since then, I have done 3 days a week.  Adding the extra 2 days per fortnight has been a bit of a challenge but I think I’m starting to adjust.  Considering I had yesterday and today off, it has made things a little easier!

I went and saw Dr Winnett today.  My and has been giving me some grief over the past few weeks.  I haven’t been able to keep much more than liquids down for most of the last week.  It’s been tough as sometimes even the liquid wouldn’t stay down.  It’s been so unpredictable that I have spent the last week with an empty cup on my desk at work just in case I need to be sick.  Well, today that seems to have changed!  He took .3ml out of my band and it’s made a massive difference.  So much so, I was able to keep my tiny serve of Nachos down :) and considering that, it means now that I am going to be relying on will power a lot more than what I have had to in the last month say.  I am not going to have certain foods just in case they DO stay down.  I don’t think I want to know!

I got weighed today as well :) Here are the stats…

‎I am 168.9kg

I lost 7.9kg over the past 6 weeks. 

I have lost 74.1kg down in 393 days!

Goodbye 170s FOREVER!

He wants me to have a Gastroscopy on Monday next week  so he can just check that everything is okay.  I am sure it is especially after spending the afternoon with my ‘loosened band’ but, it’s better to be safe than sorry.

I’ve been looking for a new car over the past few weeks.  I have sat in so many cars and each one I’ve sat in, I’ve realized that this time last year, I wouldn’t have been able to do it!  I wouldn’t have fit in any of them.  I remember that it was around about 12 months ago that I wasn’t able to fit in my Mother’s Car or my friend’s 4wd.  I am going to have to have another go at sitting in their Cars to see how much I’ve changed.

I am feeling fantastic :) I can’t remember when I felt like this.  I am wearing clothes that I haven’t worn in almost 4 years.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy!  I think I say that a lot but, it’s not.  I put SO MUCH work into losing this weight.  I don’t sit on my butt and expect it to happen on it’s own.  I am the one who goes to the Gym, I am the one who says no to the things that I know I can eat but know I shouldn’t, I am the one who is putting in the effort – the band just assists when regulating meal sizes.  And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, having a lap band is not the easy way out.  It is actually a lot harder than not having one!  You have to put so much thought into everything that goes in your mouth.  It’s hard work but it’s something that I am so glad I did.  I hate to think where I’d be now if I hadn’t had it.  I often wonder if I’d be here at all…

What’s on for the next 6 weeks? To start getting into a routine where I can go to the gym in the morning, to make sure I continue to say NO to all those bad but oh so good foods, to try and relax a little more, to enjoy the Spring Weather, to study hard and to enjoy my life as everything seems to be going so well :)