Guess who's back, back again...

It’s been a while.  I mean a long while.  And so much has happened over the last few years (I don’t even know where to start!) but I’ll aim to cover it but not today.

At the time of writing this entry, my food and water has been on point.  I haven’t had any cravings for junk, I am full and once again KNOW that I have no problems eating well or exercising when I want to but it’s when I don’t want to that impacts my progress.  There is no one else to ‘blame’ other than me.  Why don’t I stay on track 100% of the time?  Because I’m human.  And sometimes unmotivated.  I’m not always disciplined.  And the biggest thing that gets in my way of progress isn’t when I’m overeating but when I’m not eating enough.  This happens when I’m stressed.  And I’ve had a fair bit of that over the last few months.  I’m certainly not making excuses for why I’m back on track for the 1,383,204 time in my life today – I’m just pouring out my thoughts as they come into my mind.

Over the last few weeks I’ve been noticing that I’m feeling tired, lethargic, headachy and frumpy AF.  And I know what will fix that – eating well and exercising.  Sounds simple, right?  It’s not.  It’s hard.  But I need to pick my hard.  What hard do I prefer to deal with?  What hard benefits me more than the other?  What hard brings about positive changes in my life?  It’s certainly not the hard where I’m feeling miserable all the time.

Although I’ve lost 110kg, I have another 65kg to lose.  And I often make the mistake of thinking of it as 65kg rather than 1kg at a time.  Or one week at a time.  Or one meal at a time.  It seems so much.  So overwhelming.  Something that is out of reach.  But I know it’s not.  And in a few weeks when I’m feeling the benefits of changing my lifestyle again, it will feel closer than it ever has before.

My ‘journey’ isn’t just about losing weight.  It’s about my skin feeling nice, not struggling to climb upstairs, being able to chase my kids, feeling confident, loving myself enough to give myself the best and looking after my body.  I love working out with friends, feeling happier, the boost in mood that I get when I’m all sweaty and gross and the feeling of accomplishment that I get each time I do something amazing.  Losing weight is just what happens when I’m eating well and exercising.  It’s the other things that I crave and look forward to the most.  The numbers on the scale are just that – numbers. 

And I don't belong here.  Not in this space.  I didn't come this far to come this far.  I need to keep going.  Pushing through.  Reminding myself that I am capable of doing anything I put my mind to.  Digging as deep as I can to get to where I know I want to be.  I can do it.  I will do it.  I want to do it.  

So here are my goals for the week –

1.       To exercise every day.

2.       To stick to my meal plan as best as I can (I need to leave some room for error!).

3.       To journal every day.

4.       Focus on gratitude and write down 3 things I’m grateful for at the end of each day.

5.       Remind myself of how I feel when I push through the hard bits and get things done.

If you’ve made it this far – thank you for reading!  When I started blogging my journey, I never expected to have anyone be interested in what I’m doing. It started here on Blogspot but then I expanded to Instagram, Facebook and now TikTok!  I document it for me but feel so blessed that I have so many people invested in what I’m doing (for many reasons).  Your messages of encouragement and support mean so much to me.  I appreciate every single one.

Steph xo